Episode 90 - Magic Access

[Dial tone]


ROSLYN: You've reached the Love and Luck Podcast.





CJ: [Upset] Hey, Ricardo? Can I come over and see you?

I've had a really shitty day. I came out at work and it went fucking terribly. And everyone's been really intentional about misgendering me all day and I just... [Sigh] Can I come and see you? I could really use a hug.



RICARDO: [Slightly frustrated] Hell, Jason, I really wish you were still up. But this will do until I can talk to Kane tomorrow morning.

[Sigh] [Calm] CJ's asleep right now. They're doing a lot better. But... something happened, Jason. Not with them. With me.

We were laying in bed, and I was holding them while they told me about how badly they were treated today. I was stroking their hair, and... all I could think about was how badly I wanted to ease their pain.

[Seriously] And then I felt it, Jason. I felt their hurt and their upset, just as easily as if I could see it or lay my hands on it. It wasn't conceptual. It was... right there. I felt like I could reach inside them and take hold of it.

So... I did.

It was... sticky. Like toffee stretched between us. I pulled and pulled at it, and I saw that as I did, they started breathing easier. They stopped crying. We were able to settle down for the night.

Jason... I don't know what changed, but whatever magic I could feel but not affect before? I can touch it now.

I don't know where this has come from, but I'm sure that with enough time to examine the situation... I'll figure it out.

I want to go over your stories with you again when we can. There has to be something in common between all of us. There has to be some kind of catalyst that makes it possible for us to do this. And clearly mine just got triggered. So perhaps with that knowledge... perhaps we can finally figure out exactly where this comes from.



KANE: Hey. Ricardo said he left you a message last night, so, you've probably already received his big news.

What on earth could have triggered it? Nothing new has happened for him recently. Except Dognerys, I guess, but... I mean, a dog can't trigger this, right? Dogs haven't been involved in anyone else's case, not me, not you, not Helen, not Mumma.

[Sigh] And on top of that, I've been trying to repeat whatever it was that I did the other day that let me see that vision of Mumma.

Which... I mean, I thought it was a ghost when I saw her, but after listening to her tape... it couldn't have been, right? I mean... she saw me too. Ghosts don't see future ghosts, do they?

Ugh, who even knows. Either way, I haven't been able to repeat it. Mostly because I don't know exactly what I did to make it work in the first place.

[Emotional] God, I wish she was still alive. Why the hell didn't she tell me about all this when she was? Why wouldn't she mention it, even once? Why am I only finding out about all this now?

[Sigh] I wish we knew anyone who knew more about this than we do. I'm so tired of trying to figure this out on our own. But... I don't even know where we'd even start looking for someone that we haven't already tried.

I just... god, I'm so frustrated. I'm frustrated, and I'm a little bit scared, and I miss my mother.

I just... I need a hug. I might come wake you up a little early today. Sorry in advance.



JASON: Hey babe. Absolutely dead tonight. Haven't had a customer for over an hour. I'm looking forward to being able to actually close up in another twenty minutes.

Been passing the time by letting Ricardo experiment with his newfound magic on me. I have had some very impressive mood swings in the past half hour, let me tell you.

He's tired now though. Not surprising. Magic's always a little draining to use, and he hasn't got the hang of it yet, so I think he overexerted himself a bit. He headed to bed a few minutes ago, with Nerys sulking her way upstairs after him. [Chuckles] She still hates those stairs.

I have absolutely no idea what switched it on for him either. Or what caused you to see your Mum. Or anything like that. Like honestly, I only have like, half an idea of what's going on at even the best of times, so like... right now? I'm just happy I remember how to serve coffee.

[Sigh] I do wish I had some answers for you, though. I know it's frustrating for you.

But hey, maybe Ricardo will figure it out. He's a smart guy, and he seems to be very good at putting pieces together. I mean, he already said he has a couple of theories, so... that's something, right?

I love you. I'm sorry this is so confusing and difficult. But at least we're going through it together. I'm along for the whole confusing and terrifying ride.


[Cassette noise]

JULIE: [Determined] I've been practising, baby. With my superpowers. Ever since I had that strange experience at the beach, I've been trying to figure out what I did that caused it. I haven't been able to repeat it, but... I've been improving on all my other skills.

My knotwork is getting better. Both literally and metaphysically. I can pull stronger feelings into it, and the effects are lasting longer. They're still not super powerful or anything, but I am improving.

I can ease pain with less effort now, and greater effectiveness. It's still draining, but I'm learning how to pace myself.

I can predict the future up to about a half hour in advance. Still not intentionally quite yet, it still just comes on when it wants to, but... that's still an improvement. And I'm starting to notice when it's about to happen, so I think I'll be able to figure out how to bring it on by myself eventually.

[Nervously] I... tried to tell Priya about it. I told her about the beach, and about the pain, and about the precognition. I told her a bit more about what I did when she was mourning, to help her feel better.

[Disappointed] She... did not believe me. Or, well, that's not entirely true - she believes me, in that she thinks I'm telling the truth, but... she thinks I'm imagining it. That it's not real.

I don't really know if there's any way I can convince her. I mean... if someone described all this stuff to me? I'd definitely think they were making it up. So... I don't know what to do about that.

[Thoughtful] It's made me wonder if I should even keep recording these tapes, sometimes. Or if I should be talking to you about this stuff on them.

I mean, what if it's just all some kind of silly pregnancy hallucination? Or what if it goes away, or I decide to never tell you about this stuff? And if I don't tell you, then I can't give you these tapes, can I?

[Sigh] I--I don't know. I guess I've still got time to figure it out, at least.

And in the meantime... I'm going to keep practising. Maybe I can become strong enough with these powers that I can convince Priya... and myself... that they are really truly 100% real.



ROSLYN: Love and Luck is written by Erin Kyan, and produced by Passer Vulpes Productions.

Kane is voiced by Lee Davis-Thalbourne. Jason is voiced by Erin Kyan. Julie is voiced by Nic Rummery. Ricardo is voiced by Justin Jones Li. CJ is voiced by Jai Moore. Credits spoken by Roslyn Quin. Recorded by Kermie Breydon and Eris Barnes.

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