ROSLYN: This episode of Love and Luck contains references to homophobic abuse. Nothing graphic, but please, take care of yourself.
ROSLYN: You've reached the Love and Luck Podcast.
KANE: [Amused] Oh my god sleeping beauty, did you seriously write "I heart your butt" on our fridge? You massive fucking dork. Also, you know that won't rub off, right? Fridges aren't whiteboards, mate. So I hope you're happy, we have a butt fridge now. We're the butt fridge guys.
KANE: Hey... it's really quiet, we haven't had any customers yet today. Victor and I have been playing Cat Tube Famous to pass the time. I am very bad at that game, I don't think I won a single round.
[Sighs] Anyway. Just wanted to tell you I love you, and I'm fucking bored. See you when you get up.
KANE: [Shaken] Hey Jason... so, I'm still a little freaked out, but before I get to that, I should start with the fact that I'm fine, Victor's fine, the bar is fine, we're all fine. We're a bit shaken up, but other than that... we're fine.
We had a little situation downstairs. Victor's Dad came here. Apparently he saw our website open on the computer Victor used before he got kicked out or something. He yelled a lot of homophobic bullshit at us, but didn't do anything more than that, because when he started at it I began trying to get him to leave.
At first I tried the usual mundane methods, but he just kept getting angrier and louder, so I tried to sort of... magically coax him to leave. Tried to get him to calm down, and increase the likelihood of him leaving at the same time. It was... tiring, actually. I've never tried to use both types of magic at the same time like that before. Apparently that's a pretty draining thing to do.
But it worked, and he left. But it was still scary, to be honest. Victor's upstairs in the living room having some tea, and I'm... well, I'm calling you. Because when I get anxious these days I tend to think of you for comfort first. I know I could go wake you up, but... there's no reason to, really. The situation is dealt with, I'm just still feeling a little bit anxious about it. So... hence the voicemail.
Anyway. We'll probably talk about this in person before you even listen to this message, but it soothes me to leave it.
I think I might go have some tea with Victor myself.
JASON: [Simmering] So I know that when we talked today we were all, "let's take the high road" and all that shit, buuuuut... about that.
Victor's Dad came back again tonight, a little while after you went to bed. He was shouting bullshit and throwing a lot of ‘better off dead than queer' shit at Victor and I just wasn't going to fucking take that, you know?
So forget calmly getting him to leave. I mean, don't get me wrong, I told him to leave politely and shit first, but he responded with more vitriol, so fuck him. I used magic to make him lose his balance and made him fall on his fucking face. Then I grabbed him by his fucking hair and threw him out of the bar, told him to fuck off for good. He was shouting a lot of shit at me but he can go fuck himself. I won't let him think he can just walk in here and intimidate or even threaten us or our people.
We're okay. Victor's pretty upset about it, but I told him we've got his back. I hope none of this woke you.
I'm fucking furious. If he comes back I'll make his luck a shit load worse than a bruised face.
KANE: Okay, so, jeez. I kind of wish you'd actually woken me up after all that last night. That was a hell of a voicemail to wake up to. I'm not upset about it or anything, just... damn, you know?
I'm not super happy that it had to get a bit physical, as I'm sure doesn't surprise you, considering I'm the pacifistic one in this relationship, but... shit, I mean, I think you did the right thing. We can't let that sort of violent bigotry have any right to space in our bar, in our home.
Victor's doing pretty okay this morning, considering everything. He's asked for some things to do to keep busy, so I gave him a few chores. Once it gets to 3pm and QLife opens, I'm going to get him to call them so he can talk to someone other than us about this stuff, too. He needs as much support as he can possibly get during all this.
Also... I know we only barely know what we're doing with this magic stuff, but this stuff with Victor's Dad has gotten me thinking. Do you think we could do like... wards, or something like that? Some kind of protective magic, that could help keep the bar and the people in it safe? I think we should try and figure something like that out, if we can.
Anyway... we'll talk about it when you get up. I love you. I'm glad you're okay.
ROSLYN: Love and Luck is written by Erin Kyan, and produced by Passer Vulpes Productions. Kane is voiced by Lee Davis-Thalbourne. Jason is voiced by Erin Kyan. Credits spoken by Roslyn Quin. Recorded by Kermie Breydon.
If you are a victim of homophobic family abuse, please, know that help is out there. In Australia, you can call 1800 Respect on 1800 737 732, 24 hours a day, or QLife on 1800 184 527, 3pm to midnight, for immediate support. If you are under 18, you can call the Kids Helpline on 1800 55 1800, 24 hours a day.
Cat Tube Famous is a real card game, designed by Australians. You can purchase it wherever good card games can be found, and find more information on it at cattubefamous.com. Keep a special eye out for the cats on the Happy and Clever cards - those guys are the beloved pets of Love and Luck's producers!
For more information about Love and Luck, check out our website, loveandluckpodcast.com. You can also find us on facebook as Love and Luck Podcast, and follow us on twitter, at @LoveLuckPodcast.